flight of ideas

Just about a month ago, my Uncle Mar was diagnosed with cancer. Upon diagnosis, the cancer was found in 3 separate parts of his intestines. The doctors wanted to perform surgery immediately to remove the affected parts and prevent the cancer from spreading to the rest of his body. Unfortunately, he had pneumonia that time and can’t be operated on until his pneumonia gets cleared, so he stayed at home and took his medications. Two weeks ago he got confined because he was throwing up a lot and was experiencing severe abdominal pain.

It was only last Sunday when I saw him again. He was in the hospital bed, and I immediately saw that he lost a lot of weight. Pain was evident in his face, even if he tried his best to hide it. To make it harder, he was coughing a lot, and that exerted pressure on his stomach, causing even more pain.

It was an awkward and depressing situation, but I managed to smile and tell him, “Isipin mo na lang Uncle, nag-workout ka, sobrang sit-ups kaya masakit ang abs mo.”

That was a week ago, waiting to get rid of pneumonia so the doctors can proceed with his surgery. No one was prepared for what was going to happen next.

Sadly, the doctors found out that the cancer has reached his bones. I just found out earlier that the “bones” they were talking about was part of his spinal column. I also just  found out that my uncle cannot move his legs now because wherever the cancer is in his spine, it’s hitting a nerve.

After church today, we went to visit him in the hospital again. We were singing hymns of how Jesus will heal all pain and sickness, when I felt how sad I was. I tried not to cry, but I couldn’t help it. By the time my dad finished leading us all in prayer, tears already filled my eyes. I look up and saw my cousin Ronald silently weeping with his arm wrapped around his dad. Ronald is an only child, and has been apathetic about his dad’s condition until he cried this afternoon. My uncle’s eyes were misty, but he was trying to be brave in front of us.  My Auntie Lina (my dad’s sister) was not crying (probably because she has cried too much) but you can see in her eyes the anguish she feels.

I remember a quote I read when I was in fifth grade. It was a classroom decoration placed above the blackboard.

“God places tears in our eyes to put a rainbow in our hearts.”

As I was wiping my tears away, I realized that no matter how tragic things are turning out to be, there are things that have not changed — our faith, and the Lord’s promise. All the tears in our eyes now will be gone, but the Lord’s promise, his rainbow  in our hearts will remain and that will keep us strong.

My Uncle and Auntie have decided to push through with the surgery on my Uncle’s intestines within the next week. They are also going with the doctor’s plan to treat my Uncle’s spine with local radiotherapy. We don’t know the prognosis yet, but we’re hoping for the best.

Please help me pray for my Uncle and his family.

POSTSCRIPT (May 28, 2009):

On my way to work this morning, I couldn’t have heard a better song…

“…even if there is pain now, everything will be alright, for as long as the world still turns there will be night and day…there’s a rainbow always after the rain”

My uncle, Mardonio Bernardo, passed away this morning. Cancer claimed his physical body, but ’til the end his soul never stopped rejoicing with the Lord.
While we grieve for his lost, I know that angels are singing out a song for the life that he lived for Christ, our Savior.

I was looking through some of my photos, and found this:

Hehe. It’s my pangga. This was one of the very few shots I took with my cam during Mimi and Karl’s Pre-wedding BBQ party in Bora. He looks like he’s asking me what’s up.

Obviously, I haven’t been blogging too much. Neither have I posted any photos I’ve taken from different events and places – except this.

Honestly, to say that I am busy is an overstatement. But, yes, my hands are a little full right now with some activities I’m doing for our church congregation. We will be having a team building activity this Saturday and I was the one who made the module for it. Not to mention, I’m also the one making all the materials needed.

These days, when I’m not at work, I’m usually at the grocery or the bookstore buying materials or things I need to make them. There were also a few nights when I was in a meeting discussing the progress of the module with the program committee. Lately, when I get home, I open and stare at the computer until ideas strike me. If I’m not doing any of those I’ve mentioned, I’m somewhere with my pangga on a date

Not everyone knows that I’ve worked as a guidance counselor before. Part of my job is designing and implementing group dynamic activities and seminars. I’m not sure if that’s where it all started, or if it was in college, during my PSYCHo days (hehe), but I’ve been fond of making activity modules and trying to come up with all sorts of analysis and interpretation for them, depending on what the requirement is. Kahit walang koneksiyon, ginagawan ko. hehe So there, that explains why I am doing all of these.

Anyway, I think I need to get back to the module. Kailangan na ilabas ang super powers sa pag-iisip. It’s almost crunch time, and I definitely don’t want to be crushed

That’s how Mimi called it.

Like my blog url, my life is like a flight. Not only of ideas, but of faces, laughter, tears, adventures, photographs and lots of wonderful memories.

So much has changed in a year. Coming from a very stressful, fast-paced, corporate HR world, I now landed a job near home, in a small wedding photography office, where I found a much needed escape. Before, I used to wonder where my career would lead me to. Instead, I followed a path which led me to a career that I did not foresee myself being in. I’m in a work that’s refreshingly different, and that is slowly awakening my sleeping “right brain”.

I’ve also been to so many wonderful places this year like Zambales, Mt. Pinatubo, Batanes, and the latest in Boracay (where we celebrated Mimi and Karl’s wonderful, unforgettable wedding). And even if I know that I can’t beat Leia‘s Lakbayan grade, I’m happy I get to wander around the country every once in a while.

I also got to do my share of good deeds for others. Together with Markku‘s Pisay ’96 batchmates (my batchmates na rin…hehe), I’ve been able to help organize and participate in different outreach activities like hold a christmas party for streetkids in UP, teach kids in Ibang Klase, an alternative class program for kids living in front of the Pisay Campus; conduct a medical mission for the Dumagat tribe in Sierra Madre (with UP ORG), and plant trees in Ipo Dam in Norzagaray, Bulacan (with the help of UPM). I also went to a birthday outreach celebration for my friend Angge in St. Rita College Orphanage in Paranaque.

I also got my DSLR last May. Bought it from Jayvee for a very nice price. And I love it so much even if it’s not brand new. And because I have my DSLR already, I got to shoot my first wedding with Markku. Bebbet and Mervin were our officemates in SVI. Bebbet is now in the family way, a sign that we should finish their wedding album soon.

Not to forget the many new friends I’ve made this year, Markku’s batchmates, blogger friends, wedding supplier friends, etc. And of course, I can’t forget all the reunions and gimiks that I’ve attended with my ever lovable friends.

I also had my first ever anniversary with my first and only boyfriend, Markku! hehehe I just want him to always remember how happy I am to have him in my life now…and that this is the second birthday I’ll be celebrating na hindi na ko single..hehehe

So there, and to think that there are moments when I’d question my boring existence here on earth, hehehe Well, all I needed to do was look back and count how many blessings I have received, and I am reminded of the best birthday present I have — MY LIFE.

Happy Birthday to me.

***I don’t have time left to post old photos and link everything…but maybe one day after today I will.

A rainy day. I stepped into the office dripping wet. Almost half of my jeans were soaked and my jacket’s the same.

Good thing I left a jacket in my chair the last time.

Of all the days I could have, I had to forget my key today. When typhoon Karen was stronger, and no sundance can stop her.

I didn’t try to do the sundance though, maybe I should have?

I had to drop by Kris’ house so I could borrow her key. She was looking at me like, “Are you seriously going to the office today?” I told her a client might come pick up their photos so I should be here.

Deep inside, I thought why the rain had to come when it was no longer a holiday?

The moment I stepped down the trike, a familiar feeling swept over me. I was at Starbucks. I was just talking to you about it last night, about that day in August last year. Office was called off, and you picked me up. You told me you wouldn’t want me to go home in such bad weather. We were a new couple then, barely a week old. And I almost died of happiness! Before driving me home we stopped by Starbucks, the same one near my office now. And I can’t help but smile remembering how I felt being near you that time.

And now, a year after, it’s raining again. And though you’re not here to take me home, or to talk with over coffee, that same warm feeling of having you in my life stays.

And I’m sure it will for a very, very long time.

Meet Lili, my new baby.

She’s a surprise from my pangga for our anniversary. (one of the surprises pala ^_^ )

Here she is with Chichi and Lilai.

And here they are looking at their mommy’s roses

Thank you so much pangga!

It was a year that felt like a lifetime, and I was excited. I had so many wonderful plans months before, but ironically, I was left with one night to prepare something nice for Markku on our anniversary.

After work, I took a quick trip to the grocery and bookstore to buy supplies for my he”art” project, a goodie bag for my pangga filled with 12 things he likes/needs, with 12 sweet little promises/notes.

Not minding my mom’s teasing look, I worked diligently on my project at our dining table.

Cutting paper was a breeze for me. Thinking about what to write was the more difficult part.

But it didn’t take long for the ideas to come in. After all, when you’re inspired, saying what’s inside your heart does come easy.

Happy first anniversary to us pangga!

Definitely their concert’s pushing through on July 26 at the Araneta Coliseum. Below is the ticket pricelist I got from TicketNet.

Ok na ako sa Upper box A or B, basta mapanood ko lang sila. Hay!

TicketNet is now accepting ticket reservations.

When I was in school, we always sang Lupang Hinirang during flag raising ceremonies. Singing the song then was automatic.

Then I went to college. There were no more flag ceremonies, so I seldom heard or sang the national anthem anymore.

After graduating, I went back to school to work. It was a normal morning tune played every morning, until the day I listened to myself sing its lyrics, and realize the great love song that it was.

It hurts to know that there are Filipinos who forgot about the beautiful country we’re living in. They have lost hope in their countrymen and the Philippines. No more passion for a country who once struggled and fought for freedom. Now, the freedom that is ours is slowly drying in our own hands.

This is a post-Independence Day tribute to a country in hardship, a country nearly divided, the country that I love. A country I will continue to hope for, to fight for, and maybe even, as the song says, die for.

Last May 18, on our trip home from Iba, Zambales, we stopped by a stall on the road to buy some mangoes. We were a good distance away, when I realized that my phone was missing.

I asked that we go back. I know that there was no other place I could’ve left my phone but in the stall we stopped by. I was desperately hoping that no one else pulled over to buy…as that could mean some stranger finding my phone and deciding to keep it; or my phone on the ground being ran over by a parking car.

But careless as I may be to leave my phone behind, it was still my lucky day.

This was the lady who gave me back my mobile phone. The same woman who sold us mangoes (and gave us free ones to taste ).

She beamed the moment saw our vehicle, and was waving frantically as we took a U-turn. I quickly went down and approached her. She was excitedly telling me about how she heard a noise and found my phone on the ground. We were calling my phone, and the ringing got her attention. She tried to call me back, but my phone battery died. She was hoping we’d come back, and was so happy that we did.

I was happy too! I kept thanking her over and over for keeping my phone (and returning it to me). I actually regret now that I didn’t get to hug her, cause I wanted to hug her so much! I even forgot to ask her name. Luckily, KC took a picture of her. So to show my appreciation, no matter how late, I’m posting a picture of her and telling everyone how kind she is.

I’m glad that good people still exist, because they just have to! All’s well that ends well, just ask Bong.

For this mothers’ day, I bought my mom nice flowers…

…and put a small note on it.

To surprise her, I left it on her dresser while she was sleeping.

The next morning, she woke me up with a thank you kiss.

Later that day, I was in Trinoma to meet up with my Trina, Chooch and Melo. I know how crowded a mall could be on weekends, especially on Sundays, but the mall was super jampacked with people because of the occasion.

All the restos were full, but we had no choice but to patiently wait for a table at Recipes, even though we were 9th on their list. We waited so long that Trina and I were able to window shop a little, buy her slippers, and take a long, long walk around the mall. We went back just in time as we were next to be seated. By then, we were able to watch and hear some other customers complain about the long wait. One mom even almost bitch-slapped the staff (as I think Kris would put it ) when she apparently saw a group seat themselves on an empty table, even if they were not in the list waiting to be seated.

Talk about a ruined mothers’ day.

So here’s a tip, don’t take your mom, your wife, your lola (most especially), or any mom relative to the mall on mothers’ day. Maybe you can just prepare a special family lunch or dinner and eat at home. That’s less hassle and more bonding for you and your family. But if you would insist, make sure you have made reservations, or at least arrive early so that the restos are not that full yet.

In closing, here are the flowers I gave my mom, placed on a makeshift vase made from a C2 bottle, with her bundles of joy in the background.

Happy Mothers’ Day to all moms! (kahit belated na )